The impact of a question

I had lunch today with a friend I hadn’t seen in a long time. We’ve kept in touch on Facebook and through messages, but I hadn’t actually sat down and talked with her since we worked together at the-company-that-shall-not-be-named.

We made arrangements to meet for lunch, and she let me pick the restaurant. This morning before we met, she sent me the following message:

“Please don’t think I’m nuts but are there things I need to know like – certain things not to order that might make you sick, don’t hug me or get too close because I’m sensitive or hurting. I’ve never been around many people on chemo but I know it’s terrible so I don’t want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable ( I do know this – I have NO smells on)”

Kerri, please know that you absolutely touched me with this! I teared up knowing that you cared enough about ME to ask!!!!!

You explained at lunch that the only person you know who had gone through cancer was a relative two states over that you rarely saw, and you didn’t really know about what cancer affects or hurts or problems that treatment can create.

Folks, if you ever want to know how to touch the heart of a cancer patient (or really anyone), ASK what you can do to make them comfortable.

I’ve posted before about what not to say, but I haven’t posted before about what question TO ask.

My heart is full, knowing that someone who I haven’t seen face to face in 5 years took the time to ask what my needs were before we met for lunch.

Thank you Kerri!

PS: I don’t think you’re nuts. I think you’re amazing! And I’m sure many of my readers will as well!!


Thanks to for the featured image today!


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